Jeans-To Bling or Not to Bling?

Published by Denae Matherly on

Everyone likes shopping for jeans about as much as they like shopping for swimsuits. It’s somewhere between 0 and 1% fun, and 99% torture. Why, oh why can we never find jeans that fit, look good and don’t cost 7 million dollars. Mostly, it’s because we don’t know what we are looking for. So we walk into a store, stare at the wall of jeans and then start pulling out every single pair of every single type that is anywhere close to our size. That is what I do, at least. And then I take my stack of Mount Jeans to the dressing room and start slugging through them, under horrible lighting conditions that highlight all of my strech marks and muffin top jiggles, sorting them into piles of “Yes!” (not many) “Maybe” and “No”. That is, until I forget which pile is which and I have to start sifting through them all again. I may or may not leave the store with a pair of jeans.

This can end now, ladies. While I can’t procure the perfect pair of jeans for every body shape, thanks to Shari Braendal at Fashion Meets Faith  I no longer have to take the world’s biggest stack of jeans with me into the dressing room.  Here is the down and dirty version.

If you are a “B” body type (gain weight in your belly area with a flat backside), get bling pockets.  The bigger the better! Jeans with no pockets are not a good option for you, and stay away from low-rise jeans.  These will only accentuate the muffin-top that “B” body’s tend to have.  Remember, we want to look and feel our best, without feeling like our biggest problems areas are being seen like a billboard on our bodies!  Wear jeans that have a mid to high rise, and don’t be afraid to own and wear some Spanx! Bootcut jeans or boyfriend style jeans are a good choice.

For those “D” body types (gain weight in the hips and thighs with a smaller waist), girl, skip the bling.  As Shari says, just as many people see you coming as see you going.  I know they are cute and trendy right now, but sticking with a style that will make you feel your best and showcase your best assets will give you a boost more than wearing the lastest trend.  Shop for your hips and thighs and fix the “waist-gap” post-purchase either by going to a seamstress (well worth your money) or by buying an invisibelt.  These work as a belt, but lay flat all around your jeans and have no buckle that will show under your shirt.  Stay away from wide-set pockets as these will increase the appearance of the width of your derriere.  Narrow pockets or no pockets are the way to go.

If you are an “O” (gain weight in the upper body and chest area), your jeans guidelines are similar to a “B”.  Bling on the back is good to balance out the front.  Skinny jeans are not your friend, as these will make you appear top-heavy.  Look for jeans that are a straight leg or wide leg cut, with a mid rise.  A dark rinse is a great way for you to put some visual weight on the bottom half of your body to balance out your appearance and give you a feeling of looking finished.

For you “X” body types (balanced from shoulders to hips, not a lot of excess weight, but gain evenly if you do gain weight), well, you can wear whatever you want.  Just remember to use a full-length mirror when you are shopping and look at yourself coming and going.  Squat down and check for back-gap or underwear showing.  Follow the tips above if you slightly lean toward one category or another.

One last thing, I recommend shopping with a friend or visiting a store with associates who actually help you find clothes.  Then you can stay in the dressing room trying on without having to leave to search for a different size.  The jeans you need are out there.  Go get them!

Categories: Clothes